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Your Love 2.0 list / Valentine's Day

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Yes, another Valentine is coming up- whether we like it or not. Everybody makes plans – so most likely you will free pressure to plan something nice or surprise someone. 

In coaching we aim to find out what our professional and personal goals and motivations are – and make a plan of action to realise them. Then, we go and do it. After all, you are what you do and say. 

The other day I asked a coachee who had just formulated his goals for this year and 2025: So, these are your personal and professional goals. Nice. But what about your goals with others, like your partner, children, brothers and sisters, friends and colleagues. Your Love 2.0 circle as I like to call it. Why have you excluded those from your list?, I asked, eyebrows inquisitively raised. His reply, after a rather long pause, was: I don’t know. I didn’t mean to exclude them.

I asked: Is it important to you? Yes, he immediately replied. Very important even. And you’re right, I should also focus on what I want to do and achieve in that respect. Otherwise, it just gets snowed under. He hesitated again, and continued: but to be honest, I don’t think I really know what my love goals are. I just go with the flow, sort of. My reply was: Well, most people do because it is convenient and when all is well, there is no urgent need to focus on it. But in my opinion it is an important field in our lives to address, too. Many people at the end of their life regret, for instance, that they did not spend more time with their partners, family and friends. Or just took their partners too much for granted without realising every relation needs maintenance and care. I just want to make sure that you are ahead of your game in this field, too. He smiled and said: Point taken. My Love 2.0 list is coming your way soon.

As you surely have guessed: next time we will focus on his formulated love 2.0 goals for this year and in 5 years. 

How about you – what is on your Love 2.0 list for this year and 2025? 

Judith Niekel-Sjoerds

Levenslooppsychologe en Coach

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